boom-chika-boom sauna adventures

sauna without the steamOkay, let's put on our Imagination Pants as I open my second bottle of Powerade and poke Blogger with a stick so it stops giving me this dumbass "Server Error", shall we...

Imagine that you are planning to buy some chocolate on a given date... and you're really looking forward to this chocolate, but you start thinking about chocolate all the time, and there seems to be chocolate everywhere on offer, and you find yourself talking to people about chocolate, and you end up having some carob... which isn't really chocolate, but it's similar, although not nearly as good... then, finally, the day before you're due to buy this chocolate you end up being offered a couple of pieces of somebody else's chocolate... so you leave the house at 1:30 in the morning to go and have some... but it doesn't ruin your appetite for the chocolate you've been thinking about...

Of course, it doesn't help that when you finally buy the chocolate that you've been waiting over a week for, it's not actually as good as you remember it, or that it varies every time you have some... but it's chocolate... and even questionable chocolate is still chocolate....

Everyone nice and confused now?

Yeah, me too... I think I took the whole chocolate analogy a touch too far...

As anyone who's been around for a while will probably realise (and the rest of you will just have to go off the post title and pic), I took another of my little trips to the sauna this afternoon... like I was planning earlier in the week.

Interestingly, in my discussions about "chocolate" with people this week online I've had two conversations with two different people about the sauna... and maybe I need to start listening to my own advice, since I told both of them that it can depend on the day, and just general pot luck, as to what kind of an experience you have.

You would have thought, today being grey (and later turning to rain, although I didn't know that until I actually came back out again) and a little chilly that the place would have been full... actually not so much... maybe the whole "Bear Men" thing is on the wane... I dunno... but I think before I go again next time, I need to sit down and reread this post (actually, maybe all of the sauna posts).

I mean, I have had worse sauna experiences, and this wasn't really even on that list... it just made me think a couple of times about what the hell I was doing there... or whether I should have left earlier... or what... I'm just a bit ambivalent about the whole thing right now.

On a completely abstract note, I also sat in the steam room at one point and wondered what would happen to the place if the water restrictions situation got worse... I mean the whole place RUNS on water... the pool, the spa, the steam room, the washing machines to launder the towels... and I would imagine that they can't do a hell of a lot as far as recycling the water, given the whole public health thing... like I said, abstract, but it did make me think.

There was also a guy there who made me think... actually there were a few of them, but this one in particular made me wonder for a while. He was BEAUTIFUL... okay, a little Light Industrial (think cute rough trade), but gorgeous... really slender but beautifully defined body, perfect butt, nice bit of tattoo work on the shoulder, close cropped hair, hung like an absolute DONKEY... so basically, you would imagine that guys would have been tripping over him left right and center... but he had, I think, Cerebral Palsy (at least that's what I'm guessing it was) and he had the whole "not quite right" thing going. Which was a shame, because he really was beautiful. I don't want to say I feel sorry for him, because for all I know he has a great life and everything is going swimmingly, but give the whole gay community's obsession with perfection in all forms, I can empathise that maybe he gets overlooked a lot. Although looking the way he does, maybe not.

Anyway, it was a thought...

I did manage to "bag" (which sounds bad when I say it like that) a guy I've mentioned before, with the big tribal tattoo on one shoulder... although it was a little like the experience with Cubby from the first visit that I blogged about... for a big, buff, beefy dude, he was, well... not big and beefy in all departments...

I also nearly gave myself third degree steam burns in the steam room... the steam vents happen to be right in the corner of the L shaped bench, and there was a brief moment when myself and two other guys were being a little like the seagulls from Nemo... "MINE!"... over this really hot guy, but unfortunately I was on the wrong side of the L and every time I went to move across I had to move past the steam... fuck that stuff is hot! In the end I took my wounded pride and steamed buttocks and left them all to it.

Other than that it was a little bit of a non-event... or the bits that were events weren't particularly good ones (not bad, not good, just m'eh). Maybe next time I just need to bite the bullet and go on a "real" day... Friday or Saturday night... when there will be more people around, hence, one would hope, more opportunity. Or maybe I need to pack it in again... take the few pleasant memories from this set of visits and call it a day... I dunno...

On the plus side, with the many cycles of steamroom/pool/steamroom/pool that I went through, my skin is nice and soft again. Although, when I was thinking that part way through the afternoon I also remembered that it was Marc that pointed that out to me... and since that didn't work out that well... let's just say that it wasn't something I kept remembering.

I'm taking my soft skin and my chocolate analogy and going away now...

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