photo saturday: hot boy sorcerer

Welcome to Hot Boy Saturday. There really isn't a lot to this one. I'd seen somebody do the striped pants online and wanted to try it for myself. And it just turned into generic hot DnD boy. I also think that "entertainer" often ends up being my generic "hot boy background". I think this one is a juggler.

Also, have I mentioned that I really need to play another sorcerer.

I also didn't completely plan the more muted colour palette. But I do love it. And I feel like I've really gotten my eye in when it comes to making leather look good in Hero Forge.

Anyway...

Thursday Night DnD was... interesting. We met the new character who is taking over from the character we lost. I'm not a fan. I very much know that I wasn't supposed to be. The player in question and I often have some sort of relationship between our characters. We've never done "antagonistic", and that was very much what the dead character and my character had.

So I know that certain elements of this new character have been crafted to annoy my character. And that's fine. It needs to be throttled back a little, but we'll get there.

Also, we're still some time away from starting the published adventure, because DM Fluffy does insist on dangling plot hooks in front of us.

Friday was... many things.

To start off with, it was very hot. So fuck that in general. But it was also Chiro Day. And afterwards I decided to wander around the library in town, just because libraries are very much going to define my 2023. Also the fact that we're barely at the end of January and I've already read 9 books this year.

For the record, I finished 1 book in January 2016, 7 books in 2017, 2 books in 2018, 2 in 2019, 3 in 2020, 4 in 2021 and none in 2022. So... there's that.

Then we had Friday Night Not DnD. As a breather between my campaign and the one Mrs is going to run, we're playing HeroQuest, with Mr as the GM. It's not bad. I chose to play the Elf, who has a mix of magic and fighting. It's also weird. There are four characters you can play as... the Barbarian, the Wizard, the Elf and the Dwarf. So, much like early DnD, you're either a class or you're just your race.

So I'm the elf. Also the one female character, which didn't make as much of an impact as the fact the Elf has a little magic. But also because the Elf has no defined "class", my head cannon is that the Elf is a Thief. Which was partially helped by the fact that I ended up with the most gold.

Because it was a first game and we were learning what we were doing, it took a little longer than it might do once we really get used to it, but there was also a Small Child Interruption at about 11:30, so it was after 12:30 by the time we wrapped up and left. Which meant that it was almost 2am by the time I got home.

And I came home to find a giant fucking cockroach chilling on the wall over the kitchen window. So that led to a much longer cat and mouse... or perhaps cat and cockroach game, where I sprayed it with bug spray but then it disappeared behind shelves and I had to move things to try and find it and once I'd lost it there was no fucking way I was going to bed until I laid eyes on a corpse. And then I broke a glass bottle and had to also sweep that up. But finally I saw the little fucker trying to make a break for the door and I murderised it.

But getting home and dealing with that at 2am is much better than if I'd gotten home earlier and woken up at 3am to find a cockroach in bed with me. Urgh [shudder]. Gross.

Today the weather was all kinds of humid and yuck. And of course, as I say that it's started to rain.

So we did the supermarket and then came back here, and that was that really.

Current mood:

photo saturday: elf mama

Well... something different (kinda) for DnD Character Colouring Book this week.

And that something also marks the end of me running the Friday Night DnD campaign for the last 260 days.

More on that in a second. But this is Meldis. And this is what happens when one of your players gives you the gift of a mother who left and an abusive father and you still manage to turn it around to give that character a happy ending.

There's also a fair amount of Photoshop fuckery in the skirt (by which I mean the entire skirt is fuckery)... the Hero Forge version doesn't actually have any pants.

 But I also had been sitting on this idea for the longest time. Just waiting for the reveal. And, as previously reported, it went off even better than I expected.

Good times.

Anyway...

This whole library thing continues to be great. It's interesting though, that left to my own devices I've been gravitating to books that have been written in languages other than English and then translated. I picked up two the last time I was at the library and another two this time.

I also am very much enjoying doing that thing I used to do and wandering the shelves, picking up books that look interesting to me on a whim. That doesn't mean I don't also have a giant list of "to borrow" books, but I'm digging the randomness of trying out new stories, things that I would never have bought, but will happily read.

I hit up both nearby libraries this week, in order to take back my previous books and grab new ones.

Thursday night DnD we kind of got our groove back a little, and are slightly closer to actually starting the written adventure... LOL. I mean, I said that we should have started in a different place, but people had opinions, so here we are.

Friday night DnD, like I said, was the last session of the campaign, and it honestly could have gone in two different directions. One where they wreck house and go seek bloody revenge on the hags, the other where the archfey makes them an offer that two of them definitely can't refuse. I was honestly expecting for them to do both things. But no, once the offer was made, they very much leaned in that direction.

And it was the right decision I think. It definitely led to a happy ending. Which is what you want at the end of a fairy tale.

Honestly, I'm like 50% relieved that it's over (mostly so I don't have to prep for a while) and 50% sad it's done.

We are taking a little DnD break for a few weeks to play a board game, and while Mrs preps the adventure she's going to run.

Anyway...

Today wasn't much more than our usual thing. Supermarket, etc. Although we did make a little trip to Haighs after.

So, that's that.

Current mood:

photo saturday: savage killer

Sometimes there are ideas that lurk around in your head and refuse to leave. A body with the "skeleton body paint" is one of those ideas. So much so that I revisited it with a different character this week, but that one was less successful. Also, for the record, his skin is that colour because he's a Reborn (possibly he was burned and his body just has the colour of ash now) rather than any racial heritage.

The idea of both a Reborn lineage and a Zealot Barbarian mesh nicely in my head. And also a character who either has to apply body paint regularly or else has those markings as either tattoos or just as markings etched into their skin also appeals to me. The stupidity of a grumpy barbarian carefully applying paint every morning just appeals to my sense of the absurd.

And does the name mean "death" or "slaughter", yes, yes it does.

I also promise that one day I will play a character who is basically running around in their underwear for an entire campaign. Because why would I not.

Anyway.

Most of this week was me holing up in my air-conditioning and being horizontal once again.

I did go for a drive to the library on Monday morning, because the small one down the street doesn't open until 1pm most days and I was out of things to read. So off I went, only to realise that I hadn't brought my headphones and "Baby Yoga" was about to start. So that was... a thing I had to listen to.

I did grab a couple of books and then leg it home.

Thursday DnD was back... and, honestly given that we had a PC death at the end of the last game, the vibe for our return game was about right. As in very subdued. And a tiny bit... combative.

Also, I have very much realised that my character's defining trait can best be described as "not pleased at being Fate's bitch". And given that it seems that a number of gods have a stake in what we do thanks to a collective dream vision, that feeling has multiplied by a factor of about a billion.

We'll see what happens next.

I also went off to the tiny library at the end of the street to pick up a book I requisitioned last weekend. Because it showed up in two days. Whereas the last one took about two weeks.

There also wasn't Friday DnD this week because of small children and their ability to get sick. But it does give me a week to prep for what will basically be the final session. I just need to make a few decisions about what that's going to look like.

Fun times.

Anyway.

Today the weather was going to be hot, so we did the supermarket thing, wasted some time on a YouTube thing and then I sent Ma home before it got too hot.

That's about it really.

Current mood:

photo saturday: a halfling's best friend

So... this has been a thing I've kind of wanted to make for a while now. And the addition of a ton more mounts and familiars during Hero Forge's Advent Calendar let me make it a reality.

My first ever character, Belben Beestinger, on the back of the mastiff riding dog he's had since his... third or fourth adventure, if I remember correctly. So this is Barley. Because of course a halfling would name a pet/mount after a food item.

It's very sweet though.

Oh, and for the record, the final item in the calendar was a flail. Not very exciting.

 Anyway.

This week was... weird. I mean, the first week of the New Year usually is, but because NYD was on Sunday and the holiday was Monday, I legitimately forgot what day it was at least twice during the week.

There's not a lot to report for the week. I basically made the same thing for dinner each day. And spent most of most days horizontal. Because I'm getting there but I'm not there yet.

The landlord came over to put a new globe in the rangehood midway through the week. And also fixed the front door, which was hanging crooked. So, yay.

We're starting Thursday night DnD back up next Thursday, provided everyone is hale and healthy.

Friday night DnD was honestly mopping up loose ends, finishing exploring the castle, finding out bits of lore. It's weird. I was so worried about my additions not sticking the landing, I failed to see that the whole end sequence in the book kind of falls over a bit.

But nobody is unhappy about it. It just could have been so much better.

I feel like next week is very probably the final session. If not, then the following week is basically follow up and epilogue. And so my time as DM comes to an end. Honestly, I'm 50% looking forward to not having to prep and keep a whole adventure worth of story living in my head from week to week... and 50% will absolutely miss crafting a story for my friends.

I've also written the least interesting backstory I think I've ever crafted for the next Friday campaign. It works, but it was honestly like pulling teeth. It shouldn't have been, I just couldn't get it started. It's also not complex or nuanced. But, honestly, that might be who this character is... looking to the future rather than the past.

Anyway.

Today wasn't much of anything because it's another hot day. So, supermarket, back here, Ma went home. That's it.

Current mood:

movies: strange world

Let's start out with a little creative exercise. I want you to furrow your brow... like someone has just told you something that makes no sense, or you're trying to read really small text. Okay, now open your mouth slightly, like you've forgotten to close it for about 20 minutes.

Got it? You there? Great. 

Now you know the expression I had on my face for essentially the entire run time of this movie.

Actually, I'm not even sure this qualifies for any of the technical definition of "a movie".

But, I'm getting ahead of myself.

Welcome to Disney's Strange World.

I do not know what this is. It is not, however, an actual movie. Because a movie has a plot. And characters with personality and motivation. An actual movie makes me feel something other than "confused".

What this is, is if an AI was given the scripts for every Disney and Pixar movie ever (most specifically Raya and the Last Dragon, Finding Nemo, Onward, Atlantis and Moana) as well as Journey to the Centre of the Earth (all versions), Fantastic Voyage, Inner Space, Flubber and a description of that one dream you had that time when you had a really bad fever and were slightly delirious. And then it shat out this script.

Also. I have said this many times. And I'm saying it again.

Disney. Stop. Just flat out stop.

Stop mistaking "appearing on screen" for "representation". Making a main character "gay" by giving them a highly stereotyped same sex crush (oh, he's got blonde tips, wears pink and a skirt over his pants... groundbreaking), mentioning it at the start of the movie, once during the movie and again at the end while it having absolutely zero effect on that character, their journey or their personality is NOT having a gay character.

You know how you fix that. You send the crush with them on their adventures and those two characters say more than... I don't know... 9 words to each other. They develop a relationship. You know, like existed in Raya before you look all the lesbian out of it.

Or you just, and I can't emphasis this strongly enough, fucking stop.

While we're on the subject.

Having a character show up on one side of the screen for 11 seconds in a wheelchair is not representing disability. Putting a three legged dog in the same movie is even worse because the dog with a disability is on screen longer than the wheelchair woman.

You do get a very, very, very small amount of points for having the physical ethnicity of the characters in the movie match (or thereabouts) the ethnicity of the voice actors portraying them. And by points, I mean "doing the bare minimum".

Speaking of the cast. They deserved a better movie. Wasting Dennis Quaid, Jake Gyllenhall, Gabrielle Union and Lucy Lui on this piece of trash is insulting to all of them. And me as the audience.

The writer/co-director, Qui Nguyen, and director, Don Hall, wrote/directed Raya and the Last Dragon. So, clearly, those "gay pages" from Raya ended up here. Half the characters look like background extras from Raya anyway.

But it's also incredibly clear that this movie had no actual script or story. It has some words. But it's over 100 minutes long, rushes through any set up for story and character in the first ten minutes and somehow rushes through the next 90 minutes without saying anything that Disney hasn't said before or Pixar hasn't made into a masterpiece. And leaves you at the end going "whut?".

Also, Disney, as a company, can you please ensure that your male Animation Department employees have access to mental health care, because they're all very clearly suffering from some unresolved issues with both their fathers, children or both. And writing it into a movie script for the 10th time isn't the same as actual therapy. Or maybe it's time to let some women write and direct. The men clearly need a nap.

And, if you're paying enough attention, the twist in the movie becomes obvious at a certain point. Or if not "obvious", I found myself thinking "well that looks like [blank]" many, many times, and it turns out that, yes, that's because that's exactly what that was.

As an idea, it's fascinating. But it breaks down in so many different ways if you think about it for more than about 11 seconds. And no, I'm not spoiling it. It's the single thing the movie has going for it.

But the movie does not earn the reveal or have me care about the characters in the movie enough that I'm still interested in the movie by that point.

I continued to watch this movie mostly because by that point I needed to know what they thought the pay off for the movie was supposed to be and what they thought a successful resolution was. It is none of those things.

I honestly need a behind the scenes featurette about this movie. I need to know what they thought they were making. Because they failed.

This is a movie based on listening to too many Twitter threads, Tumblr memes and YouTube hot takes. And then failing, fundamentally, to make an actual movie.

This is that Disney movie that you will 100% forget existed. Or that in future will become the subject of many long video essays on YouTube that include the terms "developmental hell" and "plagued with problems from the start"... or even my absolute favourite "started principal production without a finished script".

It's this generations Meet the Robinsons (also written by Hall), Home on the Range, Dinosaur, Oliver and Company or The Black Cauldron. A movie that in about 5 years, if someone mentions it, you'll say "Oh, I totally don't remember that one... are you sure that was Disney?". Or you'll just shake your head and say "nah, never seen it", even if you did.

It's instantly forgettable.

The usual caveats apply. The imagery of the movie is stunning. As always. It's Disney Animation. Of course it's stunning. But it's candy floss and marshmallow... it's empty calories with no substance. None of it made me go "wow" because it's either weird and off-putting images or else I was staring at the movie with a confused look on my face going "but why?".

So, for the first time ever in the history of the blog, I'm introducing a new rating. Which hopefully I will never have to use again, because hopefully I won't encounter something like this again.

This isn't a real movie. It's an exercise in pretty images with nothing behind it.

yani's rating: Whut? electric brussel sprouts out of 5

2023

Welcome to 2023.

International Year of Millets and also Dialogue as a Guarantee of Peace... so there's that. And I went a little oldschool with the image for this year. All the way back to the 1930's with this photo by Gustave Roud from his Farmer Bodies series. Because who doesn't like a little vintage Swiss beefcake.

Yesterday was pretty chill. I did my usual prep. Emptied things, filled things. Took down the few Christmas decorations I had up. Changed my sheets and towels. Posted my regular posts to Twitter, Insta and the blog (Twitterversary, Insta Top 9 and Year in Review respectively).

And the Fluffy came over for NYE Movie Night.

Oh, I was also very, very happy to see Channel 9 continuing the NYE tradition and extending it this year. So not only was Can't Stop The Music on just before midnight, but before that, they put Xanadu on. Which makes my heart happy, because they're both trash, but they're the good kind of trash.

Speaking of movies.

I continued Fluffy's Classic Movie Education by introducing him to 1992's Death Becomes Her. Because what better way to end 2022 than with homicidal bitchy divas. 

And then he wanted me to finally watch the Marvel Halloween short movie, Werewolf by Night. It was about what I expected. A cast mostly devoid of charisma, a script mostly devoid of actual horror or suspense, and the usual amount of "stunt man throws other stunt man using wires" you expect from Marvel. The upsides. Cinematographer Zoe White, who made it look amazing. And, honestly, Man-Thing, the non-speaking CGI creature. Also, the makeup department.

It was not, however, the worst thing we watched all night.

Disney's Strange World. More on that shortly.

We also need to get better at timings for New Years Movie Night. So that, you know, we actually end the last movie at or just after midnight.

Because we finished up at about 11:30, wandered around my apartment for a good 10 minutes just saying "why" at each other, and then I drove Fluffy home, and was sitting at an intersection on the way home for actual New Years. Which did mean that including the drive there and the drive back, I saw about 8 different sets of fireworks go off. And got home just as the ones in Adelaide finished.

This morning I attempted to recreate the perfect egg and bacon roll I made back in... I dunno... it was 2 houses ago... so about 2015. Today's entry was tasty enough with the edition of my tomato and onion relish, but not as Instragram-worthy 2015 version.

So that's that about that.

Current mood: